My Single Change That Worked: How I Overcame After-Work Tension Via an Surprising Discovery in the Loft

I often feel as tense as a wound-up clock once the workday ends. Tension grips my shoulders, my breath turns fast and shallow. Typically, closing my laptop with a thud used to lead to the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, wine poured quickly into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Then, several months back, I came across my now-adult son’s old school recorder in the attic. Curious, I blew into it, instantly reminded of the time when it drove me crazy – his daily rehearsals felt like an attack on my ears, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head long after he slept.

But rather than consigning it to the bin, I took it down, together with a beginner’s songbook. Growing up, I had no musical talent whatsoever. I took recorder classes in primary school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Googling “how to play the recorder”, I watched dozens of YouTube videos aimed at children, and printed out a fingering chart. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, and was thrilled when I managed to knock out a passable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, yet for a stressed, impatient, musically-challenged adult, it felt like a huge achievement.

My son asked what the hell I was doing (and please could I stop), but I persevered – I liked the way the recorder made me feel. Forgetting notes easily forced me to focus on the music sheet, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breath calmed, my attention sharpened, and once I’d mastered that first faltering tune, I felt euphoric. I had managed to play music.

Now, after some months, I can handle other children’s songs and a decent Ode to Joy. Sure, my rhythm is off, and I must jot down note names, but to me, it’s not about being skilled or a “musician” – it is simply about the pleasure it brings and the fact I can’t think of anything else when I am playing.

I learned that few kids play the recorder today, which was no doubt music to parents’ ears, but it made me a little sad and nostalgic for my own school days, and my son’s childhood.

I try to pick up my recorder every evening after work as my first activity, and in those 20 or so minutes, I am in my own little world. Afterward, I feel refreshed and happy.

My friends think it’s hilarious, but one very wise therapist friend told me that I was reducing stress, and boosting mental skills, like memory and sound processing, which is precious at my age. For daily wellness, it’s truly an ode to joy.